heather & olive

 

Ah, the strange time between Christmas and New Year's where time stands still and my sluggery reaches an all time high. This is the first year in a very long time that I've taken extended time off from work around the holidays, and while it has been amazing, I think I'll be ready to get back into a groove on January 1st.

I'm currently in Quebec City spending my days eating croissants and drinking pistachio lattes but have felt a little retrospective about the best things of 2024. So, here they are:

Best Thing I Wore:

j.crew stratus pant in textured satin

I first learned of these pants via Emily's Instagram and they very quickly become the best item of clothing I purchased this year. I have them in black and and navy (and I might need them in green), and they are the most comfortable and chic pants in my rotation (think fancy pajamas). I love them with sneakers just as much as ballet flats, and I know they will continue to get a lot of wear in 2025, especially in the office.

Best Thing I Ate:

the artichoke and nettle lasagna from Fore Street

I posted about this earlier this year, and I still can't stop thinking about it. The artichoke and nettle lasagna from Fore Street was sublime: this restaurant is a Portland staple for a delicious meal, and the wood fired pasta did not disappoint. It was the perfect combination of savory and sweet, and I only wish they didn't change their menu on the daily so I could eat this forever.

The Best Thing I Read:

all the colors of the dark, chris whitaker

Gah, this book was so good. It's part thriller, part heartwarming/heartbreaking journey about old friends who experienced a tragedy. It follows their lives as they grow up and I loved every second.

 

a january mood.

Hello! Yes, I'm still here, and I'm fully embracing the concept of a gentle january (which honestly, is so much better than trying to attack a new year with aggressive energy and being burnt out before the month is over with). That's not to say I don't have any big plans--I definitely do, and some are already being chipped away at, but I'm also giving myself a little grace. January through March are tough months, and if I need to sleep a little longer in the mornings and maybe not have a smoothie for breakfast, that's okay.

The end of 2022 was a whirlwind, but was really nice. I spent the holidays with family, and was able to make it up to Quebec between Christmas and New Year's, which was perfect--so cozy and so many croissants.

I'm working on some condo updates and also am trying to figure out travel plans--I'm definitely going to Colorado this summer but might need a bigger trip. Europe? We shall see. And I'm also trying to get back into running shape--I ended up deferring the Chicago marathon last year due to multiple injuries and have been going to PT, so I'm hoping it's in the cards this fall.

In case there was any doubt, Mabel continues to be a delight and an absolute sweetheart.

I'm hoping you're being gentle with yourself as we start 2023, and I promise to not be a stranger. 

 

Happy New Year! 2021, I'm happy to see you, although I know the next couple of months are going to be a slog. But that's okay--I mean, really, what can you do?

The past couple of months were very quiet around these parts. I spent the holidays by myself in Portland, and it ended up being...fine. There was a lot of family Facetime, delicious food and way too much champagne, and while I certainly would have liked to have been with my people in person, I was reminded of how lucky I am: I have my health and a job and a small and funny four-legged friend. Things could be a hell of a lot worse.

I'm starting this week with a clean condo and an almost empty inbox and I plan of focusing on not losing my mind (at least for the foreseeable future) because this is such a tough time of year--even without a global pandemic. Maybe that means spending a little more time in this little corner of the internet but given my track record no promises will be made.

Here's to a fresh start.

Happy New Year! I know this is the time when people declare their resolutions, intentions, plans, hopes, dreams, etc. but I'm not going that route this year. Instead, I'm listing some things I'm excited about. It's better that way (for me).

Going someplace new. While I only have one trip scheduled so far for the upcoming year, it's a place I've never been: Helsinki! My sister is going on a work trip, and I've decided to tag along. We go in a couple of weeks, and I'm really looking forward to hitting up some saunas, trying new food and Kalsarikänni if we don't feel like venturing out.

Running. I know I say this every year, but this year it will be different. Here's why: I signed up for a race. Every time I say I'm going to start running again I fail, and I've come to the realization that I need something to work towards. I'll be doing the Portland 10 Miler at the end of April, and it's the perfect motivator to get me out the door (which is very important during the difficult winter months).

Cooking. I love to cook, but truth be told, I've become exceptionally lazy past couple of months. It's beyond easy to just order in (or if I'm feeling extra ambitious, go to a restaurant around the corner) and I get really sick of cooking a big meal and eating leftovers for days. I received Half Baked Harvest's Super Simple for Christmas, and I'm pumped to be better about meal planning (and halving recipes).

Trying new restaurants. I know I just said I want to cook more, and it's true, BUT if I do go out to eat, I need to try new places. It's so easy to stay close to my apartment and eat at the same (delicious) spots, but there's a whole side of Portland I never go to. Washington Avenue, I'm headed your way.

On Friday I turned 37. There was little fanfare but there was a delicious dinner at Street & Company with champagne and some pot de crème, which is always a good way to celebrate in my book.

Before I went to bed I wrote in my One Line A Day journal and in reviewing the previous years it dawned on me that this was the first birthday in a very long time that I didn't have a total mental breakdown. Birthdays have generally been tough for me: for whatever reason, I take the passing of each year as a moment to reflect and think about all the boxes I haven't checked, and all of the things I should have accomplished by a certain age. I get down on myself and think "this will be the year that x, y or z happens and then everything will be great". And then it doesn't and another year has passed and I spend what should be a celebratory day feeling crappy. It's a vicious cycle and quite frankly, it's dumb.

For whatever reason, this was the year that I decided that I've had enough of the annual pity party nonsense. It's one thing to have goals and work towards them, and it's another to think that accomplishing one of them will magically solve all of your problems and everything will be amazing. I've come to realize that I'm exactly where I should be in this very moment, and just because my life doesn't exactly look like others at my age, doesn't mean that there's anything wrong with that. Things are actually pretty amazing, and I need to celebrate that.

So here's to 37. Life is good.

{ via rifle paper co instagram }

Hello, 2019. Did you have a good New Year's? Mine was perfect: I declined a couple of invites and spent the evening with Olive, cheese, and blood orange martinis--I finished season 6 of Game of Thrones and was in bed by 9:30. It was everything I wanted.

This past year was a bit of a mixed bag. The highs included selling my old house, buying a condo and moving to Portland, and the lows were having a bit of a health scare in May (thankfully I'm fine) and a job shakeup.

I started a new job when I moved to Portland in May, and while I knew there were risks involved (it was a small startup in a very specific industry) it was also the right decision for me at the time--I was ready for a change and this provided a new opportunity with a bit more flexibility than my previous job. I was let go at the end of October, and while it was a bit of a shock, I think it was for the best: it was really stressful and I was working insane hours. They gave me a really generous severance and I learned a lot from the short time I worked there--I have zero regrets.

So now what? I'm honestly not really sure. I'm actively looking for something new, but I'm also really trying to figure out what I ultimately want to do. There are a couple of things I'm working on (some related to my legal background and others on a more creative plane) and I'm excited to see where these things take me in 2019--in the meantime, I'm trying to remain positive and keep my stress levels low(ish).

That's where I am--wishing you all a healthy and happy New Year!

It's been six months since I moved to Portland, which is kind of hard for me to believe. Sometimes I feel like I've been here forever, and then there are days when I struggle to get my bearings. All in all though, I really love it and I definitely think I made the right decision coming here.

One of the questions I get a lot is whether I get lonely in a city where I didn't really know anyone before I moved. And to be perfectly honest, the answer is no. I've made some friends in my building which is convenient and great and I know they'd always be down to grab or drink or movie or hit the town. But I also have become extremely comfortable being on my own: I have zero issues doing things by myself (and sometimes, I prefer it).

I think that being in a new city undoubtedly forces you to get outside your comfort zone (otherwise it's too easy to have Netflix and your couch be the daily norm) but I also think that flying solo is not for everyone. It took me until my mid-thirties to not only truly feel comfortable doing things by myself, but also not feel sorry for myself for not having a friend or partner to do things with.

Which brings me to dating: I'm not doing it. The whole online/app thing isn't for me and I honestly don't feel like my life is lacking in any way that I actively need to find someone to spend my time with. Would it be nice to meet someone and fall head over heels? Sure. But it's not something I feel like I really need right now. That of course, is subject to change, but at this moment I'm really happy and fulfilled as a party of one (or 1.25 if you count Olive).

Once again, it's been a month since I last posted and I've neglected this little blog of mine. I'd love to say it was because I was doing all sorts of exciting things, but to be perfectly honest, I've been pretty down in the dumps. There's no doubt that I'm in a bit of a rut in my personal life, and I'm really trying to dig myself out of it but it's been tough. I have a vision of what I want my future to look like and it's been hard to look past the roadblocks in my way--this deserves a longer, less vague post but ultimately I'm trying to be more proactive about the things I can change and accept the things I can't.

Additionally, the state of the world right now is weighing heavily on my heart. The hurricanes, the California fires, the tragedy in Las Vegas and the subsequent responses have been distressing (and a clear reminder of the perspective that should accompany my own problems). I'm at the point where I don't want to watch the news at night because everything seems to be one awful story after another.

[As a (related) aside, with all of the crap going on in Washington right now, I was really happy to discover resistbot and cannot recommend it enough. It's super easy to use and I love the ability to so quickly contact all of your elected officials at once--I definitely plan on using it on a regular basis.]

So that's the state of my world right now. I'm going to work on getting out of this funk and will work on some better posts soon.

Onward and upward!  

{ boats at the buffalo yacht club }

{ cozy nights in with the cooler temps }

{ someone found a comfortable spot while I'm working in my office }

Hello! And here we are, in September...it's been seemingly unseasonably cool around these parts as of late, and while I'm glad to see the humidity go, I'm so bummed that summer is over. I know time goes by faster as you get older, but this is absurd.

Things have been pretty quiet around here--I went to a wedding in Buffalo, NY in the middle of August that was a blast but otherwise I've been laying low on the weekends. Pure Barre has been a part of my recent routine and I can already tell a difference (also, I love the new Empower class). I started reading My Absolute Darling and while it's a bit disturbing I love the writing. I've been reading fluff thrillers for months, and although they have their own value, I'm thoroughly enjoying reading something with more depth.

And that's pretty much it. I have felt like I've been living in limbo for the past couple of months which has been frustrating. Work has been really, really busy which I like but I'm trying to get some other things lined up in my personal life and they haven't been happening as quickly as I would like. I have to constantly remind myself to take a deep breath and there are certain things I can control and others I can't (sometimes that works...sometimes it doesn't). I'm not known for being particularly patient.

Happy Tuesday!

I can't believe it's the first of August--time is seriously flying by. Truth be told, this summer has been a pretty rough one for my family and we've been most recently dealing with the death of my sweet grandfather who passed away last week. I'm so lucky that I have such an amazing support system and we're able to lean on each other, but I also hope we can catch a bit of a break soon.

I've been able to make it up to Maine for a few long weekends which has been great, and this past Saturday I saw The Head and the Heart with my sister in Boston at Blue Hills Bank Pavilion (such a cool venue). The band was so good and I'm hoping to go to their show in Portland in September.

Other than that, I'm plugging along. I have some things in motion that will hopefully come to fruition in the fall but I need to constantly remind myself not to get stressed out over the stuff that's beyond my control (something I really, really struggle with).

So...deep breaths. I'm using the start of a new month as a clean slate and fingers crossed there are good things to come.

So, I haven't really discussed politics here--not because I'm worried about ruffling feathers, but because I haven't felt super confident that I would be able to clearly articulate what I'm feeling. Quite frankly, I've had a pit in my stomach since the election and that pit slowly might be turning into a sinkhole.

At this point, my primary feeling is fear. The executive orders that have been issued within the first week of Trump's presidency are beyond concerning. I'm worried about the future of our environment, our citizens who have relied upon affordable healthcare, the reproductive rights of women and our immigrants and refugees--immigrants are the foundation of this nation and the blatant discrimination via the latest order is chock full of hypocrisy.

And although I've been in a state of quasi-depression over recent events, I've also been incredibly inspired: from the women's march to the support all over social media to the most recent protests at airports throughout the country, it's clear that people are willing to stand up and mobilize against a truly scary administration.

I'm trying take action of my own: I plan on donating to the ACLU and Planned Parenthood, reaching out to my state representatives and voicing my opinions (I know my girl Elizabeth Warren has my back), and continuing to be informed by reading and supporting publications/news organizations like the NY Times and NPR.

I love this country, and I'm proud to be one of its citizens, but I'm not going to sit idle through the next four years. And I know this was heavy for a Friday, but I haven't felt right posting about my weekends and snacks without addressing this first. Happy weekend!

I know I'm part of the large majority of people who were not sad to see 2016 go, but I've also been stuck wondering what that means for 2017.

I was looking back through some of my previous resolutions and they covered the ever so popular aspirations like drinking more water and less alcohol, consistently working out and blah blah blah. While those goals were certainly respectable a) I never ended up achieving them and b) I ultimately didn't really care to.

I think at the dawn of each new year my unspoken, more overarching goal has been to strive to be a better version of myself, and while I'm sure I've made little improvements here and there, I have a tendency to fall into the same pattern of complacency. Despite making my fair share of major, life-changing decisions in the past 5 years, once I've made them I fall into the same old routines and the same old routines slowly morph into ruts. It's hard to grow in a rut.

And that's not to say that I'm knocking routines or stability in one's life: I think those are absolutely necessary and comforting things, but there's a time and a place for them. I know that for me, in this very moment, I need to branch out and get outside my comfort zone and have a little bit of healthy instability.

So I suppose this year I'm resolving to rock the boat a little bit.

We'll see how it goes.

This is how I have felt for the past week and a half (and what I deal with every morning).

The past week has been nuts. I had a whirlwind trip to Houston (which was fine thanks to flying JetBlue, staying in an okay hotel and TSA PreCheck) but the quick turnaround and associated work stress has left me totally wiped. I think the (non-work related) highlight was stopping into Biscuit Home. I have followed Bailey's blog for years and I was psyched to get a chance to see the store in person. I seriously wanted one of everything and could have done legitimate monetary damage--it was seriously the best.

This weekend my family headed to upstate New York for my grandmother's burial service. It was so sad and so sweet--I think what was hardest for me was the finality of everything. I knew what the outcome would be when she had her most recent cancer diagnosis, but even her memorial service didn't really prepare me for saying goodbye (if that makes sense?). It became real that she's gone. 

Sunday night I made Smitten Kitchen's Mushroom Marsala Pasta Bake and it is so good, I think it might be a Thanksgiving side dish contender. I will definitely be making it again and highly recommend.

And now I need to make it through the rest of the week--I'm hoping after Friday things will start to settle down work-wise...fingers crossed. I need my sleep (and sanity).

New Hampshire leaves from late September 2014.

Victoria just did a post called Thinking Out Loud where she compiled some random thoughts she's been having and I loved reading all of her responses...so here's mine:

{ via } All of Emily McDowell's cards, prints, bags and mugs are my favorite--they're so unique and her empathy cards are especially great. Shop everything here.

I went for a hike with my dad this weekend, and finally used the panoramic feature on my phone.

There aren't any ornaments (just my gold pinecone garland), but I've been loving my big, fat tree.

Someone has been exceptionally lazy most mornings. I have to drag her out of bed.

via goop instagram

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Oh, hello. Once again, I didn't mean to take such a blogging hiatus, but life got in the way. August was a bit of a doozy of a month--MET and I broke up and then I was laid off. I was supposed to have a job all lined up, but then that fell through and I was faced with a bit of a "WTF AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE" meltdown, but I'm happy to report things are on an upward swing. I started a new job in October that I absolutely love so far, and I'm seriously happier than I've been in a while.

I've missed my little blog, but I'm thinking that a refresh might be in order.

Stay tuned.

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I will:

• drink more water
• (doable.)
• lose some lbs. 
• (it's either that or buy an entire new wardrobe, and the thought alone exhausts me.)
• drink less alcohol. 
• (eh.)
• dress up more for work (once my pants fit)
• (doable.)
• bake more, but don't indulge in the fruits of my labor.
• (see pants, above.)